Carbondale High School, Carbondale, Illinois

Whose Responsibility Is It?
by Heather Stearns

Whose responsibility is it, anyway? I was wondering that the other day as I sat listening to a conversation among a group of friends. In that group, there were many different types of people represented when it comes to dealing with responsibility. Although they may not admit it, each person has a certain idea of their own responsibilities and how they deal with them.

The first type of person I noticed was the talker. She spoke loudly and brashly, and she was "always right." Her way of dealing with responsibility is not to deal with it at all. She gets bad grades because "her teachers hate her," not by any fault of her own. She hurts other people's feelings "because they are overly sensitive." She stays out until the wee hours of the morning because "her parents never told her what time to be home." All in all, she scrapes by doing as little as she can, and nothing is her responsibility.

After I noticed the talker, I soon noticed the earnest listener, as well. She glued her eyes to the talker, and with every word that was said she nodded her head in agreement, regardless of her own opinions, if in fact she has any. The eager to please listener accepts the responsibility of everybody and anybody. She constantly apologizes for everything she says and does, and will take the blame for things that are quite obviously not her fault. She has a problem with responsibility in that she can not recognize what is her responsibility and what is not. In being this way, she comes across as very passive and gullible.

In this same group of people, there was the rebel, sarcastically commenting on everything that was mentioned. He rolled his eyes at any mention of responsible behavior, and got a crazed look in his eyes when a dangerous situation was discussed or suggested. The rebel respects nothing. He is the epitome of irresponsible behavior. He drives drunk, he practices unsafe sex, he abuses his body, and he does not take anything seriously. Whether he be at Lacrosse practice or in math class, the rebel does whatever he can to shrug off responsibility. He is not stupid or untalented, though. He has what it takes to excel, he just chooses not to use his gifts. This naive, hurting boy hates nothing more than responsibility, for he might then be held accountable for his actions.

Also participating in this interesting conversation was the girl who should know better. She is one of the most frustrating types of people to know. This young lady quickly recognizes "wrong" but somehow does not steer clear of it. She feels she can not quite commit herself wholeheartedly to being a fully responsible person, for fear of disappointing herself and others. She takes responsibility seriously, yet sometimes acts impulsively and against her own beliefs. For her, responsibility is a huge commitment looming ominously over her. She practices the "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" philosophy of life. One day, she could be an extremely responsible adult, but for now, she chooses to take the easy road and join the talker and the rebel in denying that they have responsibilities.

Although these people are set in their ways, there are things that they can do to make themselves more responsible people. The talker, for instance, can try to be more sensitive to other people's feelings and most of all, think before she speaks. The earnest listener is not exactly irresponsible, but she can improve her self-image. That would be a way that she can be responsible to herself.

I could write an entire book on ways the rebel can be more responsible. For starters, he could respect others, himself, and life in general. He could also try to play by the rules for once and see where it gets him. Although responsibility seems an impossible goal for the rebel, he could adapt his life to be a more responsible person if he tried.

The "girl who should know better" can easily become more responsible. All she needs to do is listen to her heart. For this girl knows what she should do but has trouble carrying it out. Someday she will probably be very responsible, but only when she decides to be.

After taking in all these outlooks on responsibility, I asked myself what the real question is. Whose responsibility is it? Well, I think that it is each individual's responsibility for their own actions. Whether or not one chooses to admit it, we are all responsible for ourselves and ourselves alone. Although at times it is easy to try to be responsible for a friend or loved one, we can really only be responsible for ourselves. In the same way, we can not expect anyone else to be responsible for us. We enter the world alone, and we will leave the world alone, and in between we must be responsible for our own lives. Only in that way can anyone be truly happy or successful.                                                                                             Back