Hyndman High School
Hyndman, Pennsylvania
Teacher: Janet Phillips

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One Big American Problem

By Amber May

Grade 11

 

In this day and age, divorce rates are shooting through the roof. Couples get married, regret their actions, and rush to the courthouse to get the necessary paperwork that is needed in order to get a divorce. People get married and divorced so fast that it makes heads spin. I have often wondered, though, if they ever keep their family members in mind when they get divorced, especially their children. The divorcee just assumes that his or her choice is the best choice to carry out when in fact, it isn’t.

 

It is a proven fact that people act before they think, letting mistakes go unnoticed until it is too late to correct them without consequences. If people would give their relationships time, they could realize that they aren’t right for each other. They wouldn’t have to go through the whole marriage ordeal, and then later on, the ugly divorce process. There are warning signs that a marriage has a greater probability of not lasting than it does of lasting. If the couple argues or disagrees often, this isn’t going to change just because they pledge vows and put a ring on each other’s finger. People don’t necessarily change their way of thinking and acting just because of a marriage. Some people don’t even marry for love. Instead, they marry someone else for their money, good looks, or others.  Where’s the lasting love that makes a relationship work?

           

Another fact, the fact that we have no guts, plays an important role with divorce. It is so much easier to just get a divorce, to forget about the marriage, and move on than it is to face the problem or problems that caused the divorce.  If we would be tough, and wait out the storm, so to speak, the marriage would have a very good chance of lasting, saving everyone a lot of headaches. Plus, by working through their problems, the couple might even grow closer together and understand each other better than before, possibly preventing future arguments.

           

This probably isn’t important to most people, but the couples should think about their community’s view on divorce.  If the community absolutely does not approve of divorce, the people involved may be turned into an outcast by the community. Co-workers have been known to be very cruel at vulnerable times.  If the couple has any kids, they might get teased and mocked in school, especially if the other children’s parents look down on divorce. The couple needs to think. The child may not be able to handle the divorce, and if he or she goes to school and gets made fun of, the child is going to have an even worse time trying to get through the nasty divorce. And, the immediate family could have a hissy fit over the divorce. Imagine the reaction of the in-laws.  They will wonder why their relative wasn’t good enough.

           

On the other hand, the community may not care about divorce.  A couple may get a divorce and practically be praised by their own community.  They may be encouraged by their co-workers to get the divorce.  They may have their co-workers and even their family members stand by them through the whole process.  The kids may even get help from some classmates whose parents had already gotten divorced.  These kids would know what it is like to see their parents go their separate ways and could be a real friend during the divorce.

           

Even if your community and family may support your divorce, you must think about your children. If you would put yourself in their position, and see the situation from their point of view, you may change your mind. It is possible that you may have come from a broken home. If you did, try to remember how you felt about the situation. You may not have wanted your parents to split up, but they probably didn’t even ask you what you thought about the divorce.  Please don’t ignore your child’s feelings.

           

Your child is going to feel like he or she has been cut in half.  One parent will get custody, while the other parent will get visiting rights. There will be no more family dinners that your child loved because he or she will either be with you or your spouse. The child will now have two houses to live at. It may seem awesome to the child at first, but before long, favorite clothes will be at the wrong house. There will be no more parties and dances because they will be happening when the child is at the other house. 

           

Then, during holidays, both parents and their child won’t be together.  Instead, the parents will be fighting over who gets to spend the holiday with the child.  The child just wants to be with his or her parents.  In fact, some children end up resenting their parents for keeping the family apart.  It means more to the child than you may think it does.

           

I just feel that people need to think before they tie the knot. It may not be the best thing to do.  Plus, if they would just consider the possible consequences of both marriage and divorce, they  could avoid many problems. It isn’t that hard to think about something before doing it. It’s smart, and easy.

 

Answers To Questions Regarding Required Reading

 

Q1- How does society invest in marriage in the USA and in Manus?

A1-Society more often takes to married workers than to divorced workers.  They feel that                           people who stay with their marital partner has more commitment than a divorced person.

 

Q2- Interview 10 married people.  (No names.)  State the length an number of each one’s marriages and a line or two of advice from each on how to maintain a long, happy relationship.

A2- andldskfdlfdslkfj

 

Q3- According to Richard Eckersley, what should our collective goal be?

A3- He thinks our goal should be to dematerialize society without reducing quality of life.

 

Q4- Write a worthy goal for your community.

A4- To become more independent from other counties around us by fighting to be our own district.

 

Q5- Comment on the excerpts from “Tomorrow’s Child.”

A5- I believe that the excerpts are telling the truth.  In schools, the wealthy students rarely mingle with the poorer students.  The school clubs are made up of all the wealthy students because the poorer students don’t have the money to go on the club trips.  If this separation continues, the gap may never be closed.

 

Q6- How does the fact the USA is a democracy make lawyer particularly helpful, according to Kathleen Sullivan?  How does our diversity, wealth and size make lawyers particularly helpful?

A6- They act as liasons between individuals and the state. They also protect us from the majority.  With diversity, different customs conflict with each other.  When this happens, lawyers help mediate between the two customs.  Wealthy people sometimes feel they are better than others and sometimes attempt to control the lives of others.  In cases like this, lawyers help the victims regain control of their lives.  Because we are a big nation, organizations usually take the national view and ignore the local view, causing the lawyers to help the locals get recognition.

 

Q7- Ms. Sullivan claims bad practices are changed  either by regulations or punitive damages.  Which do you prefer and why?  Can you think of an alternative?

A7- I believe bad practices are better changed by applying regulations.  The trouble is that the regulations usually aren’t followed.  An alternative would be to

 

Q8- Briefly describe three ways society would benefit from the coming retirement of baby boomers, according to the required reading.

A8- (1) With the baby boomers retiring, many of their jobs will go to the Generation X’ers.

(2) With the Generation X’ers going to work, they will need babysitters for their children and aging parents.

(3) Plus, the elderlypeople stuck in their homes may need teenagers to do the chores and run errands.

 

Q9- Evaluate the likelihood of President Clintons anti-poverty program making a real impact.  Give at least three reason to back up your conclusions.

A9- sljg;lsfkgsflgj

 

Q10- Name three things Truett Cathy and Tom Lewis have in common.

A10- (1) Both knew at an early age what they wanted to do at some point in their lives.

(2) Even though in different ways, they both wanted to help people.

(3) No matter what happened to complicate things and no matter how many people doubted their success, neither of them gave up.