By Lynde Edwards

12th Grade

The new teen wave is bigger, richer, better educated and healthier than any other in history. There are now 31 million kids in the 12-19 age group, and demographers predict that there will be 35 million teens by 2010, a population bulge bigger than even the baby boom at its peak. Most teenagers expect to go to college, and girls in particular, have unprecedented opportunities, they can dream of careers in everything from professional sports to politics, with plenty of female role models to follow. But, is it time for local communities to initiate a rite of passage for American youth? Society puts a lot of pressure on children and expect them to know what they want to do with their life after school. It’s a tough decision, and it’s hard to find something that person would like to do for the rest of his/her life. Is it necessary for our communities to initiate a rite of passage for the youth, when a lot of the teenagers today are acting and taking on the responsibilities of the adult in the family.

Half the reason for this is because the parents are barely home, trying to hold jobs of their own, and make money. Many teens feel overwhelmed by pressure and responsibilities. Some are juggling part-time jobs and many hours of homework every night; sometimes, kids in our school are so exhausted that they’re nearly asleep in the morning classes. Sixty-three percent of teenagers today are in households where both parents work outside the home, and many look after younger siblings in the afternoon.

Teenagers are desperate for guidance, and when they don’t get what they need at home or in school, they join cliques, gangs or immerse themselves in a universe out of their parents’ reach. Teenagers may claim that they want privacy, but they also crave and need attention. Martina McBride stated in one of her songs that teenagers are walking around in a culture of darkness, living together alone. But, with the guidance from parents, teachers, or other adults, it can shine some light into their life, and then they know there is someone out there who cares.

America has changed from the way it is now compared to back when our parents where teenagers. Many do realize this, but it’s hard for them to come up with a way to try to face it. They can teach their children about the facts of real life. Don’t hold any information that would eventually hurt a child in the long-run. When teenagers have the sense that they are being ignored by their parents, teens are more vulnerable to serious emotional problems.

No matter how much parents try their hardest, and no matter how much they try to protect their children from every day problems such as, drugs, alcohol, smoking and etc., they can’t totally stop the problem, but they can make a tremendous difference.

In the teenage years, the relationship between parents and children is constantly evolving as the kids fringe toward independence. Early adolescence is a period of transition, children move from one teacher and one classroom to a different teacher for each subject.

In the real world after high school, “Life is not divided into semesters, and you don’t get summers off. Not even spring break. You are expected to show up every day for eight hours, and you don’t get a new life every 18 weeks.” (Chicken Soup For the Teenage Soul II) In high school, students are literally on their own and don’t have the kind of help they did in the early years of school. We begin to develop a unique sense of identity, as well as our own beliefs and values. Trying to force them to be something you want them to be, rather than help them be who they are, can only make problems later down the road.

Teenagers today have been through a lot, and I think a lot of them are ready for the “real world.” I think it would help a lot if parents or adults could take time to really talk to their children and explain to them problems they faced when they where the same age and ideas to help them get through life. The lessons best learned are those that they come from. We do listen, even though it may not seem like it, we hear what people are telling us. We might not show that we know, but later on in life we’ll remember the advice we got and put it into action.

Laurence Steinberg, a psychology professor stated, “Parents have to be able to let go, have faith and trust that they’ve done a good enough job as a parent, that their child can handle this stuff.”

Answers To the Questions From the Required Reading

1. At the start of her 1961 Preface to Coming Of Age In Samoa, Margaret Mead stated that children and youth today are not becoming all that they can be which is reminiscent to the Army recruiting commercial which says “Be All That You Can Be.”

2. I feel that all the issues listed for us are still problems today. They may even be stronger than what they were in the 1920’s. There is still a struggle with the particular language with minority children and what they should speak in their home. Society also puts a lot of pressure on children, and expect them to know what to do with their life, and what they exactly want to achieve. They have time to decide what they want in life, so all they can do is sit back and wait for them to decide, and not pressure them into decisions they don’t want to take. Race and color aren’t as a big of issue as it was before the Civil Rights. But with the immigrants coming up from Mexico, society seems to putting these people on a separate pedestal. Then the cycle starts again. One issue that I don’t think is a really big one is the effects of artificially separating children from a knowledge of birth, love and death. I do agree that children need to know the difference and deserve to know the truth, but I don’t think it happens very often.

3. I do agree with Margaret Mead and that culture is man-made and that man is free to design it closer to the desires of his own heart. Teenagers today, I think, have trouble finding out their true self, and go by what others think of them, what others plan to do, and they don’t make time in their busy schedule to find themselves.

4. In her writings Margaret Mead was advocating greater knowledge and control over the civilizing process.

5. I do believe that my peers and I would like adults to recognize more what is going on and to enforce “boundaries and structures.” I think that parents of teenagers don’t want to face the fact that there is problems out there, and that their kid can actually be the one that’s out there getting caught up with the wrong things. For example: drugs, alcohol, smoking and etc.... When the adults would set more boundaries and structures, it may not eliminate them all at once, but it can help to minimize the problems step-by-step.

6. Three things that I absolutely, positively know, saw or experience concerning drugs and alcohol among students at my school would be....

A) I have witnessed many of my peers drink or smoke at particular parties.

B) I have heard upperclassman talk about where they get their drugs at.

C) I also know how much alcohol and drugs can mess up your life. I’ve seen it and heard it happen to people I care about the most.

7. My solution for the “plight of black teenager” wouldn’t stop the racist people that we still have today in our society, but it could be something to think about. My solution would just simply be for people to stop basing their opinions of people just because of their race, color, social status and etc.... The black teenager today, I think, still goes through discrimination. I have eye-witnessed accounts where a store manager would have his fellow employees watch a black teenager to make sure he wasn’t stealing anything. A lot of this I think, starts with the parents, they forget that children listen to their comments and when they hear mom and dad talk bad about a certain person they feel obligated to think the same way.

8. I’m glad that I attend a school where it’s mixed with different types of people. It’s a way for me to develop good social skills for in the future and when i take the big step into the “adult” world. It lets me learn and communicate at the same time.

9. Yes, I do believe that incorporating community-based learning is helpful because it allows the student to go out in the community and get a feel for what it’ll be like when they get out of school. It allows them to understand concepts that are important to survive in the “real world.” It also gives them the opportunity to see what they would like to consider doing for an occupation later down the road.

10. I do agree that six grader’s today know what marijuana is, and some of them have tried it. Things have changed and adults need to realize that. It isn’t like the good ol’ days anymore. Parents and adults need to take measures at home and inside of school to make children realize the dangers of problems today. Instead of denying the fact that their 13 year old could possibly be doing drugs, try to prevent it and get them involved in safe activities. Encourage them to participate in extra-curricular activities, community work, spend time with them. Time has changed, along with the teenagers compared to their parents when they where the same age.

Works Cited

Kantrowitz, Barbara and Pat Wingert. “How Well Do You Know Your Kid?” Newsweek

10 May 1999: 36-40.

Canfield, Jack. Hanson, Mark. Kirberger,Kimberly. Chicken Soup For the Teenage Soul II